"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start,
anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending." ~ Anonymous

Monday, March 16, 2015

Officially Signed up to Run

Friday I paid for my entry to the half marathon run of the Run for the Warriors Race coming up in May.  So, it's official and I'm committed to it now.  :)  

This is the race that three years ago my husband challenged me to try the 10K instead of the 5K.  I thought it quite nice that I chose to challenge myself once again to complete the half marathon of this same race the last year we will be living in this city.  (We are moving this summer.)

It's a lovely run that winds through a neighborhood about 5 minutes from me.  Now to continue my training and pray for nice, cooler weather that morning.  :)

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Can I Really Multitask?

**Note:  This is a somewhat random post, but it's a peak into where I'm at lately.**

I like to pride myself on my ability to multitask.  However, I don't remember how this came about, but my husband pointed out, "You think you can multitask, but really you slow up what  you're doing because of talking on the phone." 

Oh, that's what it was.  Somehow, we were talking about how I love to chat on the phone while I fold laundry.  I don't have to think too much about folding the laundry, so it's easy to do and get a good conversation in.  

At least I felt that way until the next time I was folding laundry and talking on the phone and caught myself stopping during the conversation to use my hands to, oh...get a point across maybe?  To a person who can't even see me... lol

Then it hit me, "OH! I do fold laundry slower when I'm on the phone..."  oops.  *giggle*

I share this little story, because I have been going through something recently, a new something, something that has taken an emotional toll on me and has kept me from getting things done, like focus on eating better.  

It sounds like an excuse, and maybe it is, but it's true.  I'm noticing when I'm going through things I tend to not care about how or what I eat. 

n fact, on a few long runs I listened to music for the duration, which I never do, because I really didn't feel like hearing someone talk about how they lost weight and are succeeding when I'm dealing with [something more important that picking salad over hamburger].  

In fact, as I've been dealing with this issue I've been having to make myself just keep living like normal, knowing that things are really out of my control.  I can only work on myself and truly give the rest to God. 

This also means my health.  It's why I keep running, because trust me I don't usually feel like exercising when I'm upset or trying to "fix" something.  But this time I have to.  

And while I like to think I can work on multiple things at a time, I think maybe in reality I can not truly do that, or do it well.  I can do a couple things, but things that are of importance might be slower getting done if I pile too many of those important things on my plate.  

This is not to say I will not work on my healthier eating, it's just to say that part of the reason I haven't cared is because in the grand scheme of things it just hasn't been a priority.  

But I know it has to be, and that's why I'm back on here sharing where I've been and why I am going to get better about where I need to go.  Because even if I can get these extra pounds off slower, just like I do get my laundry done eventually when I'm chatting with a friend, it has to be done.  

Plugging Along...

...like the awesome mother runner that I am. 

Yes, the running is going well.  The eating not so much.  Recently I saw a picture that reminded me I really need to get my eating back on track to lose this weight I put on last year.  It was motivating, even if it wasn't the most encouraging photo.

As I peruse blogs in recent days I know I'm not alone in this need to tone back the snacking and better the food choices again.  While I don't wish weight gain on anyone, it is kind of nice to know I'm not alone.    

Now I just need to get it done.  I have cute clothes that are uncomfortably snug and I refuse to buy bigger sizes, so I need to get er done and enjoy my cute t-shirts and capris when the weather is warm enough to wear them. 

Same song, different day... so....

Meanwhile, I continue training for my half marathon and I am doing fine.  

We've had some cold, icy days, but we've also had some cold beautiful sunny days.  Lucky me, as a military spouse, I have access to a few different gyms on base, so on inclement weather days I can go to the gym to run.  

Most days I do that and some days I just skip it.  Since I'm on a training plan, with a race date ahead of me, I tend to do more going to the gym and less skipping runs.  I'm grateful to have teenagers, so I can do this whether or not there is school.  

My husband told me a while ago to sign up for a race, 'Because you seem to be more motivated to run when you have a race on the calendar."  It's so true.  

So, the eating still needs work, but I'm currently enjoying my running and doing well with that.   I'm plugging along, keeping the scale from going up any more, and knowing that I need to keep my health a focus no matter what else is going on.  

Have a good day! 

Thursday, February 19, 2015

My Healthy Heart Run

Like I said...life is happening.  I'm still working through some stuff, but finally taking a moment to share my attempt at a running selfie I took for the Healthy Heart Challenge I participated in last weekend. 

This was easy for me to join because I already had a long run on the schedule.  It turned out to be a beautiful sunny and cold Saturday, which I was grateful for so I didn't have to do my long run on a treadmill.  I was supposed to do 6-7 miles and ended up finishing strong at 7.25 miles.  Woot! 

If you're interested, click here, and check out the other participants in Lori's Healthy Heart Weekend challenge.  

Friday, February 13, 2015

Life is Happening & Healthy Heart Weekend

It's been an interesting last two weeks with days I'd rather forget, or rather had never happened.  Everything will be fine eventually.

I've been doing some reevaluating of things that need to be taken care of in my life and getting some projects done around the house (read: clutter cleanup), so blogging kind of took a back seat for a bit.

It's not the way I envisioned beginning my new year, but you can't have the flowers without the rain so to speak.  

On the health side of things...

My training is going fine.  I've been getting my runs done and a little bit of strength training with Jillian Michaels DVDs in as well.  My weight is still hovering between 178-180, but I have not gained any so far this year.  Right now, that is a plus.

So, that's where things are right now.  I will be participating in Lori's annual Healthy Heart Weekend with my long run tomorrow.  

Our temps are dropping back down to freezing, so it will most likely be an afternoon run tomorrow.  The sun should be out so I'm looking forward to a beautiful winter run.  We don't have snow like farther up north, but I'm still putting my cold weather pants to good use this winter. :) 

I hope you all have an enjoyable Valentine's Day tomorrow.  I have surprises for my kids and 4 extra littles my teen girls are babysitting overnight.  I'm looking forward to a nice day.  

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Half Training Has Begun! a.k.a. I've Got This

It was a slow run, but it was lovely out.  I decided I can be vexed with how slow I was, or I can look at it as a starting point -- a point to look back on and be excited about how much I've improved when race day comes in May. 

I choose the latter. 

My goal for this race is to finish in good health.  I may be a little slower than last time, but I may not. It's too early to tell.  Quite honestly, I am making myself not care so much about the time.  

I'm finding that getting back into regular exercise can be vexing if I allow myself to compare to where I was a while back.  So, I'm choosing to remind myself every minute I spend doing intentional exercise is always better than the years I spent sitting doing nothing.  

When I finished the run I felt good.  My knee wasn't bothering me and I felt strong.  So, no comparing.  Just hard work and enjoying the fact that I got it done! 

Because I may be slow, but I've got this.  :) 

Thursday, January 22, 2015

One Year Post Op - Emotionally Speaking

Thankfully, as I sit to write today's post I am not as upset or depressed as I was a few days ago.  In fact, it's almost hard to sit and repeat the level of frustration that had me in tears the other night as I mumbled out to my husband something like this...

"I was supposed to have surgery last year, heal and get back to running with my new smoother stomach.  I was supposed to get back to exercise feeling so much better without my flabby stomach bouncing everywhere.  Then my mom died and I never had the chance to simply recover."

Yes, one year ago today I received a phone call in the evening telling me my mother had passed away in her sleep.  It was exactly what she would have wanted, but not exactly what I was ready for.  She had been ill, but not deathly ill and her death was very sudden for all of us. 

I couldn't even cry very good because of the pain from my surgery, and that made me want to cry harder.

Needless to say, the stack of books I had planned on reading as I recovered stayed unread as my days of recovery ended up being spent planning a funeral with my dad long distance, between naps and recovery walks around the living room.

My husband took good care of me, my kids had some snow days and we enjoyed some lazy days together, but I had to begin to work through the grief from the worst day of my life.  And looking back, I'll never know what it's like to simply have a major surgery and heal from it.

On top of my mother dying, a month and a half later my then 13-year-old son was in a major ski accident breaking his femur and tibial growth plate.  He was on a youth ski trip with our church.  We drove five hours to be with him in the hospital, watched as they took him back for surgery and as he came out with a rod in his thigh and pins in his knee.

We brought him home as carefully as possible, where he began his recovery here at home.  My husband had to take some days off of work because I was unable to lift my son since I was still healing from my surgery.  (Talk about frustrating.)

After an infection at one of the pin sites and finding a torn ACL in the fall he is still going to physical therapy three days a week to heal and strengthen his leg from that accident.

Unfortunately, those two major events in my life left me somewhat reeling.  My faith in God helped me not fall into a depression like many do, but I suddenly had to deal with more grief and struggle than I really have had to in my lifetime.  

I was still able to continue my regular life commitments, take care of my family, run a 10K in May and October and keep going, but I suddenly felt like my life had been turned upside down and I couldn't maintain my healthy habits enough to keep my weight down.

I think you get the point by now, so I won't go into any more details.

Let's just say about last fall my husband had to remind me that the year started out bad, but it wasn't all a bad year.  But when I wasn't able to get back on track and being losing the weight I had gained I began to feel like the worst failure ever.

When I knew my one-year followup was coming and I still hadn't lost any weight, plus I'd had to stop running and doing any intense exercise last November due to my foot and knee injury I was even more vexed.  I planned on going back to my doctor with nicely healed scars (yes) and a nice fit, smooth body (like I had at the preop, but minus the flabby skin. ..didn't happen.)

However, *deep cleansing breath* I have had to sit and remind myself I am not a failure.

I'm a woman who has had a failure this past year, but not without some fairly good reasons behind it. It's not an excuse; it's the facts.  

The other night I was melting down because I felt like a bad example of a healthiness lady for having allowed these facts derail me for a time from my healthier living.  At the same time, a friend of mine reminded me a few weeks ago that I did care, I didn't not completely give up, because I've only gained 20 pounds back. 

And that is why I made myself write a just-the-facts post the other day about how well I've healed from my surgery.  Because when I look in the mirror I see a slightly pudgier middle than a year ago post surgery, but I need to choose to see that it's only 20-pounds and not the whole dang 70 pounds.  

So, maybe when I go to my one-year followup surgery I'll be embarrassed that I'm that slightly pudgier abdomen, but oh well.  

It is what it is.  I healed up great, I'm happy I had the surgery and it's time to move past the regret and take the emotional energy I've spent last year in sadness and turn it back into something healthful in my life. 

Tears will still come at times with regards to my mom I know;  however, my son is well on his way to healing and I have everything I need to lose this weight and get back into my new normal again.  

And until I'm completely where I'd like to be I'll continue making the choice every day to do what is best for my body instead of giving in to unhealthy choices because "I just don't care since ___ happened."